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Corey Holcomb Biography

A native of inner city Chicago, Corey Holcomb grew up looking for and finding humor in almost any situation or circumstance. As an adult he has focused his comedic talent on addressing the age old conflict between men and women by exposing the humor behind the heartache. Corey is not afraid to incorporate his own experiences with relationships, breakups, bitter ex's and a fundamentally flawed child support system into his stand up. Corey's humor has universal appeal allowing him to impart his hilariously outrageous opinions and advice on subjects such as dating, marriage and divorce to any audience anywhere-and kill every time.

Corey Holcomb comedy specials

  • Corey Holcomb: Your Way Ain't Working (2012) Corey Holcomb Your Way Ain't Working Filmed at Mandalay Bay Resort & Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. The special was released on July 6th, 2012.
  • Corey Holcomb: The Problem is You (2004) Corey Holcomb The Problem is You Filmed in Irvine, California. The DVD was released on June 15th, 2004.

Corey Holcomb jokes, Quotes & One Liners

If I ain't getting none, you have a $10 date spending limit. I mean, you got enough for a couple of drinks. You can have a ball at the Dollar Store.

Ladies, if you're out on a date with a guy you haven't slept with, please, keep your conversation to an absolute minimum. Because ain't nobody listening to nothing you're talking about. Until we get some, we can't comprehend that stuff that's coming out of your mouth.

Ladies, I want you to know that erection problems in most cases are just misunderstandings. There's probably nothing wrong with the guy at all. He's just tired of you in particular, or he just got some before he came in the house.

You know that special classroom back in grammar school? They've got them everywhere. You know, the special ed -- the room that only has, like, eight, nine kids in there; two of them are cross-eyed, one of them's got a real big head; go on a lot of field trips; all of them smell like pee.

Ladies out here in the dating game, I want you to know that if you are over 30, still talking about men ain't no good -- it's you, baby.

I know how it is -- you're too scared to ask for what you want. You take a girl out, spend all your money, get that little kiss on the cheek at the end of the night. That never happens to me. I ask for sex when I show up at the door for the date.

I'm not like the average guy. I don't want a woman with hopes and dreams. How are we going to have a productive relationship and you believe in yourself?

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